How To Enjoy Planning Your Wedding

My husband, Max, and I got married this past April only five days after our state shut down due to COVID. Our entire wedding day was flipped upside down. We had to quickly adjust our plans and move our large wedding celebration to 2021 and replan a 10 person wedding in my parent’s backyard. My sister and Mom really stepped in to help create a day that was just as special as the day we had planned. All of this chaos helped me realize all the ways you can plan a joy-filled wedding day, despite the challenges thrown your way. Maybe you won’t have to deal with a pandemic, but likely you’ll face some sort of challenge that will require you to focus more on the incredible moments a wedding brings. Wedding planning gets such a bad wrap for being stressful but I think it is possible to plan a wedding and have fun in the process!

Identify your priorities – Independently, and Together 

When you first get engaged, it can be so exciting to get started planning! Take this time to start thinking about your priorities. Most couples can’t make all aspects of a wedding a reality, due to either budget or availability, so its important to figure out what, and who, are most important to you. I suggest working on this together, and apart. Give yourself plenty of time to consider as you might realize something about yourself you didn’t already know. Consider asking key family members the same question. While the day is about the couple, it is also a major milestone and celebration for the families involved. There is lots of joy in including special touches that mean a lot to the family involved. 

Using Wedding Planning as an Opportunity for Dates 

Wedding planning includes tons of meetings, calls, and visits. Use these as an opportunity for new and exciting dates! Get your favorite take out on the night you have a call with your photographer, make a day out of visiting your venue with lunch or a picnic, take your officiant to your favorite coffee shop to meet. Wedding planning gets a bad wrap for being stressful but really it can be a great opportunity to spend time together while engaged. 

Build your Confidence 

One thing I notice most at weddings are the brides that truly feel self-confident. No matter the hair, make-up, or dress, the best thing you can wear on your wedding day is confidence. Spend time before the wedding learning to love yourself in a real way. Picture yourself feeling confident in your dress. Imagine the joy on your face. Spend some time getting to know your insecurities and learning to accept your body how it is. I can’t underestimate how much more joyful a bride’s experience is when they are confident! 

Do Pre-Martial Counseling

I would really recommend pre-marital counseling of some sort during your engagement. Max and I planned to get married in a Catholic Church so were required to do it, but found that it was actually so worthwhile. Ours took place over a weekend with a group of other couples and it was actually pretty fun. While we didn’t discover anything shocking about each other, we did really enjoy having uninterrupted time together. We had a chance to talk through a bunch of different aspects of our married life and actually worked on our communication skills a lot. We dated for 9 years prior to getting married and I still feel like our pre-marital counseling weekend was so valuable!

Focus on The Things Within Your Control

You can’t control the weather, you can’t control a freaking global pandemic. You can make sure you have your favorite lipstick packed. You can make sure you drink plenty of water in the weeks leading up to the wedding day. You can get a pair of comfy slippers to get ready in. You won’t be able to make everyone happy, and everything will not go right, but you can make sure you are as prepared as possible.

Be Present

Lastly, my biggest advice is to be present! While wedding planning, really live in the moment and focus on the aspects that make you the happiest. On the day of, leave your phone in your bag and enjoy the company of the people around you. Look into your partner’s eyes and soak it all in! I remember looking around my parent’s dining room and thinking “I hope I never forget this moment.”

I hope this was helpful to those of you planning a wedding now or in the future! Let me know if you have any questions by commenting below or over on instagram.

All my love,

Carla